Next Sunday is Mother’s Day. It’s been on my mind because I know so many moms don’t want it to come. Mom’s whose children are incarcerated, struggle with an addiction, same sex attraction, or mental health issue. Mom’s whose children are estranged from them for a myriad of reasons.
It’s too painful. Too hard. Too sad. Too depressing. Is this you? Does Mother’s Day only remind you of what you’ve lost? Does it throw in your face the shattered dreams and crushed hopes you try to not think about every day? This holiday has the power to make a hurting mom’s heart break open – and bleed.
It bleeds because things are still unresolved. Because you still have no guarantee of when or how this will end. It feels like this has been going on way too long. Enough already. And now – another holiday. Not again.
I hope it helps you a little bit to know someone else understands.
You are not alone.
There is always hope.
But when the pain is too deep – don’t be alone. Reach out and find support. Don’t fake it the next time a friend asks, “How are you?” Stop pretending you’re okay. Don’t say, “Fine”, when you aren’t. You’re far from fine. If “fine” was a city in Texas, then you’d be living in China. Is that far enough away from Texas?
Look for a support group by doing an internet search – there’s Al-Anon, Nar-Anon, Families Anonymous and NAMI (for mental health issues), and Celebrate Recovery (coda groups for family and friends of addicts). If your child doesn’t have an addiction these are still great groups to be part of. The principles you need are the same. Google “parent support groups” or “parent groups” and see what you find in your area. There are online groups, too.
Talk to trusted friends who care about you and your child. Be honest. Tell them you’re hurting and need their prayers. Each time you talk about your pain it helps to drain it out. So pull the plug and let it go.
And remember this Bible verse:
“If the Lord had not been on our side . . . the flood would have engulfed us, the torrent would have swept over us, the raging waters would have swept us away . . . Our help is in the name of the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth.” (Psalm 124:1, 4-5 and 8)
This week, as you see and hear countless reminders of Mother’s Day on the internet, on TV, and everywhere, if you feel like you’re being swept away by sadness, reach out to a friend and to your Maker. He’s on your side. He won’t let you be overcome. He’s the Creator of all things and he cares about you. Yes. You.
Father, you understand our mother’s hearts. Please comfort every mom who reads this. Thank you that you care and that we are not alone. Amen.